Photo by Han-Hsing Tu on Unsplash
In short: Love is something you do as much as something you feel. It helps you get to know yourself, gives you strength when life is hard, and starts with the way you treat yourself. Put into action through small daily gestures, such as listening, helping and being kind, it makes a real difference to the people around you and, little by little, to the world.
Think about the last time someone did something loving for you without being asked. Perhaps a friend rang just when you needed it. Perhaps your neighbour left a bag of tomatoes on your doorstep, or a colleague quietly took something off your plate on a difficult day. You probably still remember it. That is what love looks like when it leaves the heart and goes out into the world.
Love is a beautiful thing. It brings people together, it brings joy, and it helps us discover who we really are. We all look for it in one way or another: with a partner, with our friends, in our family. It isn’t always easy, of course. It can be messy, complicated and sometimes painful. But even in the middle of heartbreak or struggle, love can be a source of strength. Let’s look at the different sides of love, and at how you can put it into action.
What does love teach you about yourself?
At its heart, love is about connection. When you love someone, you feel deeply linked to them. And when you open up to love, you let another person come very close. That can be frightening. It can also change you for the better.
Loving someone often brings you face to face with your own insecurities, fears and soft spots. You find out how you react when you feel hurt, how well you listen, how easily you say sorry. You may be asked to grow in ways you never expected. Love pushes you out of your comfort zone, and that is where you discover parts of yourself you didn’t know were there: more patience than you thought, more courage, more tenderness.
Does love make us happy?
We link love with happiness, and for good reason. Feeling loved gives us a sense of purpose, of meaning and of belonging. When we feel connected to others, life feels fuller and more joyful.
It’s worth remembering, though, that happiness isn’t something another person can hand to you. It’s a state of mind that comes from within. Love helps, because connection and purpose are such a big part of a happy life. But in the end, it’s up to each of us to cultivate happiness day by day. If you’d like to explore this, I wrote about the difference between joy and happiness, and why joy can be there even on days that aren’t easy.
How does love help you through hard times?
When you face something difficult, knowing that someone cares about you can be the thing that keeps you going. It might be a partner, a friend or a member of your family. You don’t have to carry everything by yourself, and simply knowing that changes how heavy the load feels. This is one reason friendship matters so much.
Love also makes us stronger by teaching us skills: empathy, honest communication, forgiveness. We learn them with the people closest to us, often the hard way. Then we take them everywhere else, to work, to our neighbours, to the community we live in.
Why does love start with you?
Being loved by others is wonderful. Loving yourself is essential. It means accepting yourself as you are, flaws and all, and treating yourself with the same kindness and compassion you’d offer a good friend.
Self-love isn’t always easy. But when you love yourself, you’re better able to love others. You’re more confident, more resilient, and you handle life’s ups and downs with more calm. If the voice in your head is often harsh, you may like my article on moving from self-criticism to self-love, or the one on being kinder to yourself.
What about love in a world of screens?
Technology has made it easier than ever to connect with people. It has also brought new complications: messages that are misread, silences that are hard to interpret, the feeling of being in touch with everyone and close to no one.
The fundamentals of love haven’t changed. Honesty, communication and respect matter just as much online as in person. If you stay true to your values and remain yourself, you can build real, meaningful connections this way too. A simple test: does this exchange bring you closer to the person, or does it replace seeing them? A message that ends with “shall I call you tonight?” is technology at its best.
How can you put love into action?
Love can be a force for change in the world. When you act with love and compassion, you make a positive difference in other people’s lives. That can happen through volunteering, through standing up for a cause you believe in, or simply through the way you treat the people you meet. Each loving act creates a ripple that travels further than you’ll ever see.
Love is the bridge that connects us to others and to the world around us. And a bridge is built one plank at a time.
Try this today
Listen fully to one person. Put your phone away, look at them, and let them finish before you answer.
Say the kind thing you’re thinking. Tell someone what you value in them. I explain why this matters so much in the benefits of expressing appreciation.
Do one small thing for someone outside your circle. Hold a door, carry a bag, ask the person at the till how their day is going. Small acts of kindness cost very little and are remembered for a long time.
Give a little time. An hour for a local association, a visit to an older neighbour, a meal cooked for a friend who is going through a rough patch.
Be loving towards yourself. Go to bed on time, eat a proper meal, speak to yourself gently. You can’t pour from an empty jug.
Love touches every part of our lives. Whether you’re looking for love or learning to love yourself, it can change you and bring you closer to who you really are. By welcoming it in all its forms, you create a life with more joy, more resilience and more purpose. Together, we can spread a great deal of love in this world.
Frequently asked questions
What does love in action mean?
It means showing love through what you do, not only through what you feel or say. Listening properly, turning up when someone needs you, giving a little of your time, speaking kindly to a stranger: these are all love in action.
Can I make a difference if I have very little time?
Yes. Most acts of love take a few minutes: a message to a friend who is having a hard week, a real thank you, holding back a sharp reply. Small things done often count for more than one grand gesture a year.
Do I have to love myself before I can love others?
No, you can do both at once, and each helps the other. But when you treat yourself with kindness, you have more patience and more energy for the people around you, so self-love is never time wasted.
How do I keep real connection when so much of life happens on a screen?
Use the same values online as you do face to face: honesty, respect and clear communication. Let technology help you stay in touch, and make sure it leads to real conversations, a phone call or a shared meal whenever possible.
Would you like some help?
The way we love, others and ourselves, shapes how we eat, sleep and look after our health. It’s one of the things we talk about in my group programmes in nutrition and health, such as Six Tuesdays in Montignac. If you’d like to hear when the next group opens, write to me at hello@catherinepolet.coach.
Would you rather work one to one? I also coach online. Book a free 20-minute call, and we’ll look together at how you could take better care of yourself, so that you have more to give to the people you love.
About Catherine
I’m Catherine Polet, a holistic nutrition health coach, yoga and autogenic training teacher for more than 30 years, author and speaker. I help people find a way of eating and living that suits their own body, online in English, French, Spanish and German, and in person in Southwest France.
