Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash
In short: The way you see the world and react to it is shaped by your mindset, and your mindset can be trained. With a growth mindset, you believe you can learn and change, at any age. Visualisation, autogenic training and gratitude help you build it, and when you turn your attention from problems to possibilities, life starts to feel lighter.
The alarm goes off and the list is already running in your head. Emails, the appointment you mustn’t forget, something for dinner, the call you’ve been putting off. You get through the day, you do everything that needs doing, and in the evening you realise you can hardly remember a moment of it. You were there, but on autopilot.
As busy women in our forties and fifties, especially those of us who run our own business, we can easily get caught up in a whirlwind of responsibilities. Overwhelm and stress move in, and joy quietly moves out. What decides whether life feels joyful and fulfilling, or tense and unsatisfying, is very often our mindset.
I made a short video about this, you can watch it below.
What is a growth mindset?
Years ago, as a health coach focused mainly on nutrition, I realised there were underlying issues that nutrition alone couldn’t address. That was a turning point, for me and for my clients. It led me to embrace the growth mindset: the belief that our abilities and our intelligence can be developed. And it wasn’t only about my own growth. It was about passing this belief on to my clients, and guiding them to see the possibilities that lie beyond the limits they had set for themselves.
The term was coined by the psychologist Carol Dweck, and it stands in contrast to a fixed mindset. With a fixed mindset, you believe your abilities can’t change. “I’ve never been sporty.” “I have no willpower.” “I’m just not a morning person.” With a growth mindset, you believe you can improve through effort and learning. “I haven’t found the kind of movement I enjoy yet.” Hear the difference? One sentence closes the door. The other leaves it open.
This matters enormously when you want to change your habits. If you’d like to see how it plays out with food and weight, read how your mindset can make or break your weight loss.
How do you cultivate a positive mindset?
Your mindset is like a powerful magnet: it can draw the positive towards you, or the negative. Three practices help you replace overwhelm and stress with joy, fulfilment and success.
Visualisation
Visualisation means creating a mental picture of the future you’d like. By seeing yourself succeed, you prepare your mind to get there. Say you long for a better balance between work and the rest of your life. Start by picturing one day in which you manage both: you’ve done good work, you’ve closed the laptop at a sensible hour, and you’re relaxed at the dinner table. I explain the method in manifest your goals: the power of visualisation.
Autogenic training
This relaxation technique reduces stress and brings a sense of peace. It leads you into a state of calm from which you can meet challenges with a clear, focused mind. To get a first taste, picture yourself somewhere tranquil, a quiet beach or a still forest. Feel the calm seeping into you and clearing your mind of tension. You can learn more in autogenic training: a pathway to tranquillity.
Practising gratitude
Acknowledging the good in your life trains your mind to notice more of it. Make it a habit to note three things you’re grateful for at the end of each day. It can be as simple as a good cup of coffee or as big as something you achieved at work. It’s a small practice, and it brings more joy and fulfilment than you’d expect.
These are the same three tools I describe in more detail in mastering the mindset shift.
Problems or possibilities: where do you want to dwell?
When you move your attention from your problems to the possibilities ahead, you change the energy you give out. Possibilities are like light. Problems and negativity cast heavy, dark shadows. It’s up to you to decide where you want to dwell.
Try it on something small today. The next time you catch yourself thinking “I can’t, because...”, ask instead: “What would be possible here?” You don’t need a full answer. Asking the question is enough to let a little light in. And if what you hear inside is mostly criticism, this article on negative self-talk may help.
Shifting your mindset isn’t always easy. But life doesn’t have to be complicated or a grind. It can be light, with joy and freedom in it. The key is to recognise how much your mindset shapes what you live.
A ten-minute meditation to connect with lightness
To bring all of this together, here is a short guided meditation. Read it through once, then put the page aside and follow it in your own time.
Find a comfortable seated position, relaxed and alert. Close your eyes and take a deep breath in... and out...
Picture a white light shining from your heart. This light is all the possibilities that lie within you. As you breathe, let it grow brighter and wider, until it fills your whole being.
Breathe in deeply... and as you breathe out, see the light spreading beyond your body, filling the space around you, reaching out into the universe and connecting you with all that is possible out there.
Now turn to gratitude. Bring to mind something you’re grateful for. Breathe in, and feel gratitude filling your heart... breathe out, and send that gratitude into the world.
Finally, let your body relax. Starting at the top of your head, travel slowly down through your body and release any tension you find on the way. Breathe in calm and peace... breathe out stress and tension.
Keep the image of the white light as you slowly bring your awareness back to the room. This light is your positive mindset, your belief in possibilities, and your ability to create the joyful, fulfilling life you wish for.
Where do you start?
The power to shape your mindset, and with it your life, lies within you. It begins with a single step, and that step may feel daunting. Take it anyway. Our challenges aren’t roadblocks. They’re stepping stones. And at every step, your mindset is your greatest ally and your guiding light.
Mindset is also part of something bigger. Joy and fulfilment rest on three pillars, and I describe them in the three pillars of joy and fulfilment. The first of them is health, in the widest sense of the word: have a look at holistic health, the first pillar.
Until next time, remember that your perfect life is waiting for you. All you have to do is take the first step.
Frequently asked questions
What is the difference between a growth mindset and a fixed mindset?
With a fixed mindset, you believe your abilities are set and cannot change. With a growth mindset, you believe you can improve and grow through effort and learning. The term was coined by the psychologist Carol Dweck.
Can you really change your mindset in your forties or fifties?
Yes. A mindset is a habit of thought, and habits can be changed at any age. It takes regular practice and patience, and it helps to start with one small practice you can keep up.
Is a positive mindset the same as ignoring problems?
No. Problems are real and they need your attention. A positive mindset means you also look at what is possible, so that you face difficulties with more energy and more ideas.
How often should I do the meditation?
As often as you like. Once a day for a week or two is a good way to become familiar with it. After that, come back to it whenever you feel heavy or stuck.
When should I talk to my doctor?
If stress, overwhelm or low mood last for weeks, affect your sleep or your daily life, or if you feel hopeless, talk to your doctor. Mindset practices are a support, and they do not replace medical or psychological care.
Would you like some help?
Nutrition alone is rarely the whole story, and that’s why the way you think and talk to yourself is one of the things we work on in my group programmes in nutrition and health, such as Six Tuesdays in Montignac. If you’d like to hear when the next group opens, write to me at hello@catherinepolet.coach.
Would you rather work one to one? I also coach online. Book a free 20-minute call, and we’ll look together at where a little more lightness could come into your days.
About Catherine
I’m Catherine Polet, a holistic nutrition health coach, yoga and autogenic training teacher for more than 30 years, author and speaker. I help people find a way of eating and living that suits their own body, online in English, French, Spanish and German, and in person in Southwest France.
